Shaded eyes tell you nothing

Once I was hanging out with my older male cousin who as always been a great writer.. I was 16 he was twenty something anyway he was explaining a poem that he had just written; the way the words flowed mesmerize me. His poem evoked emotions, I could empathis even though I had obviously not shared the experiences that inspired this poem. The way his words flowed simply addicted me to his prose, made me conscious of who he was and the plan ugly of life sometimes. He had always been the cool cousin, I mean he introduced me to Led Zeppelin.. but he wasn’t the cousin who bought me cigarettes he was the cousin who inspired me intellectually and brought light to the realities of life.

Back to this poem … I cant remember exactly the title of this poem but it had one phrase in it that I will never in my whole life forget… ‘Shaded eyes tell you nothing’. Over the years I have thought and thought about what he meant by this and  time and time again I simply deduced that it had something to do with bodily image and possibly fake people. Today in my life as a ‘mature’ erm 25 year old, the phrase is still ringing in my head, the thought angers me and finally I can seriously related to this…

What does make up… dresses.. and the whole body glorification tell you?  *^&@ all! Girls can be total posing attention seeking bitches… as much as I hate to say it – girls will pose and pretend and an investment to some girls is a new dress which is secretly a weapon they will use to sponge drinks off some idiot who takes the bait. That said… some guys arent much better… and yes they deserve it. Image evokes a perception to me a perception is based on ‘ideals’ that are created by social norms. Screw society, screw its norms. Image tells you nothing about a person. Image creates awkwardness, unease to those who don’t conform, it cause bulimia and stigma. As I age I realise that stigma is something I can totally deal with but who are you to judge me on my image.. shaded eyes or not.

I would like to dedicate this post to the priest who asked me if I had issues when I dyed my hair blue, and to the boyfriend I had who told me I was a dark and bad person because i hid behind dark sunglasses and made me read the bible… “I am what I am”  I do not hide who I am… I dont want to be judge by my appearance, my looks are part of who I am but then again they dont make me who I am. My body is not like a super model because yes other ex-boyfriend you guessed Im not a bloody supermodel. Can you see my brain? It doesnt look pretty but it works and so far seems to be a pretty good one!

So I thank my couz for a valuable lesson that I should have learned a long time ago now… we are surrounded by posers, image conscious empty freaks, people who hide behind socially acceptable images, and people who think that materialism is the only way in life. Really… shaded eyes.. tell you nothing!